Day Dreams, Please

   Agnes, Francine, and Evira were having coffee at Victor’s and talking about relationships.
  
   “I give him seashells and he puts them in his window,” said Francine.
  
   “I let him know who the bitch is,” said Evira.
  
   “Murble, gurble, bleh,” said Agnes, “I like the guys in my head much better.”

   “There are guys in your head?” Francine cocked her head inquiringly, “What are their names?”

   “Zach, Tootie, and Fred.”

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   “I kinda agree with you,” Francine pauses, then plunges on heedlessly, “You ever imagine that maybe some kind of disaster happens and all of society falls apart and we have to form these communal groups in order to survive . . .”

   “Yeah!”
  
   “. . . and you’re in the same group as him and in your fight for survival he is drawn in by your skills and character?”
  
   “Mmmmm,” Evira and Agnes sigh in unison, “Skills and character.”

   Agnes polishes off her coffee, “How about this? He catches Ebola and no women want to be anywhere around him because he’s contagious and has to live in a bubble, but I don’t care and I sneak in and make love to him and . . .”
  
   “And if your love child survives he becomes the Anti-Christ?” Francine arches her brows.
  
   “That’s a little too weird for me,” Evira giggles.

   “He’s stuck in a giant block of ice,” Francine sips her tea.
  
   “With Ebola?”
  
   “No, no, no. No disease, just cold, frozen, unconscious, in a block of ice. I have to defrost him using my body heat or he will face certain death! So, unselfishly, I have to warm him up. Naked.”
  
   “Of course.”

    “Oo! Oo! Oo!” Agnes bounces up and down, “I’ve got it! He was in the war and he lost an arm and he feels like half the man he used to be, only really he’s three quarters the man he used to be. Anyway, he’s really freaked out about the whole thing and thinks that his stump is disgusting and I meet him and I’m like, ‘Can I see your stump?’ And he’s like, ‘No!’ And I say, “Please!” and he says, “No!”
  
   “Was that coffee decaf?” says Francine.
  
   “So then finally he shows me his stump and I think it’s the sexiest thing in the world and he lets me touch it!”
  
   “Uh,” Francine examines Agnes’ coffee cup, “I thought you ordered decaf, but it says ‘double’ right here.”
  
   “I feel like there’s something on my cheek that I can’t get off,” Agnes scratches at her face.
  
   “No . . .”

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   After coffee, Francine went for a walk with her boyfriend. Evira intentionally avoided her boyfriend and went to a belly dancing lesson. Agnes went home and talked to one of her plants until she passed out.

    Tootie recovered from him Ebola but always maintained that something very strange had gone on in his bubble one night. Fred got a prosthetic arm and started playing bass guitar for a band that was twice as loud as they were good. Zach temporarily transformed into a plant, attempted to convince Agnes to take an interstellar vacation with him. Agnes woke up the next day with disturbing dreams of having been a goldfish.